Narcissism and Social Media: A Love Story?
Once upon a time, in Ancient Greece.
Narcissus was a handsome hunter. Many fell in love with him, but he considered them all with disdain. The gods decided to punish Narcissus for his behaviour. They led him to a pool, where the man saw his reflection in the water. He immediately fell in love with it. “Who is this beautiful man that I see?”, he wondered. But when he realised it was only a reflection of himself, he fell in despair; he could not have an affair with his own person!
The man committed suicide, and legend says he was transformed into a flower that took his name: narcissus.
Like Narcissus, narcissistic people feel an excessive love for themselves.
But… what is the link with social media? I’m getting there.
Some studies have found a correlation between social media use and narcissism. This question has raised interest during the last decade, especially with the increased use of social media. How many people have at least one account on whether Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and others? More than 3,5 billion people worldwide used social networks in 2020. And this number is expected to increase.
But first of all… what exactly is narcissism? The myth of Narcissus gives us a starting point but doesn’t explain the whole subject.
The Cambridge Dictionary defines narcissism as “too much interest in and admiration for your own physical appearance and/or your own abilities”. Indeed, narcissistic people may not be only admiring how beautiful they are, but also how competent they are.
So… Is social media making us more narcissistic?
The answers are mixed.
VIEW 1: YES
A couple of studies go to this direction. Social media has been accused to enhance self-promotion. A majority of posts represents moments from people’s lives, isn’t it? Pictures of their travels, of the food they eat, and even of themselves.
Here we come closer to the question, with selfies. Consider this: only on Instagram, the hashtag #selfie gathers 444 million posts. If you don’t believe me, go and check in your Instagram research bar, and you’ll be surprised by the results.
Taking selfies to present a new makeup, photographing yourselves in front of a monument; the motivations are multiple, but the result is quite the same: showing the world what’s up with you.
But is it a bad thing? After all, everyone would be guilty of that at some point. Don’t worry, it’s not bad… if it doesn’t turn into a disorder. The narcissistic personality disorder exists and is defined as “a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships and a lack of empathy for others”.
In other words, it’s when this self-love and quest for attention becomes an obsession. When you can’t help yourselves but constantly posting on your feeds, constantly checking others’ reactions to your content, and feeling so upset when you don’t get many “likes”. When everything else doesn’t matter except what others would think of you on social media, and if you’re constantly seeking praise and compliments; that can be problematic.
It’s not a desirable mental state, isn’t it? Being always pressured on what you’ll post on social media and always seeking to get more friends or followers. You may also compare yourself to others who you consider to be “more popular and attractive” because they have more followers and/or more “likes”.
But people are not to blame; social networks are addictive. Even more, they are made to be addictive. Features such as infinite scrolling are designed to keep you on their platforms. Result? You can stay hours on Twitter or Instagram, whereas you only wanted to spend 5 minutes. It makes you lose time for other things, as I wrote in a previous article. This addiction maintains your desire to post on social media: you want to show that you too, you can share great content, to flatter your ego.
These are several reasons why social media can feed narcissism. But others might go in the opposite direction.
VIEW 2: MAYBE NOT
All content on social media may not be related to self-promotion. You may want to share information or discoveries without seeking approval from others. When you talk about the last movie you have seen, or the last book you have read, is that self-promotion? Not necessarily. You may only want to share this with those following you, because they can be interested in this movie or book as well.
Even selfies may not be a narcissistic feature. You can photograph yourselves while you’re travelling abroad, for memory’s sake. Here it has (almost) nothing to do with narcissism.
It depends on the intention behind that action. Why do you share this information? To get more followers to your account, or for the pleasure of sharing? Because above all, social media also aim to enhance social connection. It is admitted as one of the first benefits of these networks.
Some research also suggest that social media is beneficial for our self-esteem. This experiment, for instance, demonstrated that Facebook use increases self-esteem of people but not narcissism. Psychologist Ciarán Mc Mahon shares this view too. According to him, social media allow people to “test different identities and find a comfortable place in society”.
Also, Lucy Clyde, a counsellor and psychotherapist, doesn’t think social media make people more narcissistic, but they are rather an expression of it. They enhance our narcissistic traits. We are all seeking attention and recognition at some point, because we are “social animals” as Aristotle stated. But the difference with being a narcissistic person is that we don’t constantly seek this attention and recognition.
We are all narcissistic, but some are more than others. Narcissism may be a mental disorder.
SOCIAL MEDIA: A VICE?
Don’t get me wrong; I am not against social media, and I am not here to give a moral lesson. I am as guilty as everyone else of being active on these networks, and I don’t blame anyone.
Social media connects people from all over the world. But bear in mind that they also hide vicious effects.
What I’m only saying is that we should be careful in our use of social media. We should make sure it doesn’t become an obsession. Because, well… it would prevent us from being happy and enjoying what life can offer.
